Tyler Hoechlin rocking a Mariners hat!
im in love. i might watch this show now.
On August 22, 2012, the Mariners are 11.5 games back in the AL West..
Mariners take the series vs. the Angels as they win 4-1, snapping Jered Weaver’s 10 game win streak with help by two HR’s by Jesus Montero and a great performance by Jason Vargas!
And the blue birds did not die but they probably got kind of hurt a little bit because getting pelted with rocks is only sometimes pleasurable and at the least their emotions were hurt because Son of Canada Michael Saunders was one of the most prominent rock throwers and it always hurts when children throw rocks at their parents even if the parents are perched just outside the window and WON’T STOP CHIRPING AND SOMEONE PLEASE SHUT UP THAT DAMN BIRD.
Many good games were had by Mariner hitters in addition to Canadian Son Michael Saunders with Seager and Ackley and Ryan doing more than the standard hit ball and jog to first once in a game because they all had either a half homer or two hits or a stolen base in some order.
Iwakuma used jetlag to fuel the most dominant start of his career and scared 13 birds away from the plate with rock like objects and a person would think that jetlag would make poor fuel but those persons would be wrong because jetlag proved to be a much better fuel than anger which is what fuels Brett Lawrie because Lawrie was chased away from home plate 4 TIMES after striking out and his anger issues most likely stem from being worse at sports than his sister and generally just being a worse person than her overall but in truth she is pretty amazing so it would be hard to live up to her standard.
Also: It is not that we are taking credit for the flurry of Mariner moves during and after the game but it is a pretty big coincidence that some minutes or hundred minutes after hitting create on the Trade Deadline Post that the Mariners made all their moves. Some sadness for people leaving or going to Tacoma and some new players which might be futurely good which is not sadness and at least Brandon League is going to a place where he won’t be tempted with distractions like partying and jello-shotting.
Funny interview moments with Casper Wells
The heroic Mariners clubbed homer after homer and after nearly every one the Selig-Cabal lead NotTheCubs miraculously came back and we say miraculously in the most sarcastic way possible because cheating is not really miraculous especially when you eventually fall to the gallant hero after cheating like crazy because the Mariners would not be cheated of their rightful victory today.
ICHIRO launched two bombs and both were leadoff bombs and Smoak and Sanders both homered love you long time and Jaso and Ryan and Montero all had half homers and all of those heroic DHs except Ryan had at least 2 hits except also for Saunders who HAD FOUR HITS because he got back to basics today after his failed attempt at smoothness yesterday but he redeemed himself all the way today and Jaso was probably the clutchiest clutch DH today because he clutched his clutch double in the clutchiest inning which was the 12th where the cheating beast died.
The pitching highlight was not poor Hector Noesi who got cheated the most today by the cheaters but it was TOM WILHELMINASON and his stroke inducing curveballs who got the Mariners to the mouth of the beasts cave and the other exciting thing was Stephen Pryor and his 100 mph lasers in his first ever big league game.
Casper blowing a kiss to his mom in the stands after hitting a 2-run HR on Mother’s day!





